Two Beiber Brushes and a NKOTB pillowcase

Am I the only one who received 2 Justin Beiber singing toothbrushes for my (30th) birthday?

Pretty sure I was. Lucky for Rodney me they were different, which means different colors and 4 different two-minute songs. Lucky for Rodney me I haven't used them yet because I'm still using the one my dentist gave me.  

I'm also pretty sure I'm the only one (if not, please fess up) with the rest of this list.

-Driven off with the drive thru banking cylinder.
-Uses the windshield wiper fluid level as a gauge for changing the oil (not the best idea, I realize this)
-Gets called Brooke or Blair or Blaze or Blaine once a day (possibly more)
-Calls leggings "leggins"
-Carries the family dog around like the family toddler
-Sleeps on a NKOTB pillowcase (well sometimes Hottie Hubs does, so I guess I'm not the only one)
-Knows the Royal Ranger code and was never a Royal Ranger
-Has an arsenal of over 100 beanies/beardies/fingerless gloves
-Could eat an entire smorgasbord of breakfast items the millisecond my eyes open each morning. (except biscuits and gravy as explained in next bullet)
-HATES gravy. Especially country gravy.  Chunky, peppery, sausage-y substance??? NAST-TAY. 
-Watches "Hey Dude" on my lunch breaks. C'mon little doggie
-Falls up the stairs wearing a Snuggie (however I'm sure I'm not the only one)
-Uses the Snuggie sleeve as an eye mask at night. 
-Dropped a cell phone in a port-o-potty hole 
-Used a rest stop bathroom barefoot. Oh wait. That wasn't me. That was Britney Spears.  
-Impulse purchased a Spongebob Squarepants Sno-Cone Maker.
-Still own Moon Shoes. As seen in the super awesome picture from this post.
-Believes in a right-handed world conspiracy. 
-Thought the Knitting Factory was just as the title says.  And I did remember thinking it was weird but cool that G Love and Special Sauce was playing there. But we went, and it was amazing. Minus all the knitters I thought would be there sitting on couches enjoying the show. Boy did I look strange crocheting in the mosh pit. 
-Stretched my earholes to now regret that decision. <insert my mother's voice saying "I told you so"> They grew back, well for the most part. The left one is still a little big, but nothing the elderly women can't compete with after decades of wearing heavy dangly earrings. 

Going back to the NKOTB fetish I still got goin on....I recently ran into a long sleeve NKOTB shirt at Forever 31 21 and it got me goin on my childhood love.  So I bought some plastic NKOTB earrings off of ebay and have added a NKOTB pandora station to my mix.  So funny how I remember the words to all of the songs, not just the famous ones. 

"Listen up everybody if you wanna take a chance, Just get on the floor and do the new kids dance!" 

Slanket turned Snuggie?

I own a Snuggie, or what I thought was a Snuggie until I saw an actual Snuggie. (yes thats 3 snuggies in one sentence)

I'm not one to be big on brand names. I will say brand names usually means better quality, but sometimes a little lower quality for a lot lower price is the best route. However, take cereal, I honestly don't like the way cheap no-name brand cereal interacts with the milk in my mouth.  It seems to mush quicker. So I buy the real deal. 

Now, take the Snuggie.  Its a thick fleece straight jacket minus the straps.  And so is the *slanket, its cheap counter part, except its not as thick, and it doesn't have the Snuggie logo sewn on its sleeve. But it does the trick.  It keeps my body warm, all the while my arms can do the YMCA perfectly.

With all that being said, I can continue on with my Slanket transformation into a Snuggie story.

A couple Christmases ago, I opened a great practical gift from my parents.  A blue Snuggie.  My mom said she bought it from a Snuggie infomercial, and it even came with the reading light. Totally legit, right? Turns out, after I compared it to my nephew's Jr. Snuggie it was not.  I should have known by how long the reading light lasted (about a week).  The fabric was totally different, still fleece, but about 1/2 as thick, and there was no Snuggie logo tag on mine!!!! 

So I quickly called my mom to advise her of the imposter Snuggie I've been snuggling with.  She was confused, because she swears it was a Snuggie infomercial! <Insert image of Ed Norton's Fight Club character ordering the entire IKEA collection.>  Come to think of it, my Snuggie wasn't even in an official Snuggie box. I loved teasing her about my Snuggie turned Slanket.  I've come to realize that unless you're naked under your Slanket, there's no real need for super thick fleece.  (I don't advise going naked under Slankets or Snuggies due to the completely open back)

Little did I know, my mom has been devising a plan to make mine "legit".  Soooo, last weekend (my birthday weekend) she came over and kidnapped my Slanket without my knowledge. I was surprised that my hubby even knew where to look for it considering my organizational skills.  She had come into contact with a real deal Snuggie at a yard sale she was working, carefully "ripped" the logo off, and put the now Snuggie turned Slanket back into the yard sale pile!!!  I'm sure you can see where this is going.

Days later, during my 30th birthday bash in my backyard, my mom was badgering asking me to go get my Slanket for my grandpa to wear while he was sitting outside.  It was my party, and I'll disobey if I want to.  So I found a blanket for Papa to wear, mainly because I didn't have a clue where to start looking for the Slanket. But she persisted, so I went downstairs to the laundry room, to find my blue Slanket sitting there folded.  But when I picked it up, I immediately saw a Snuggie tag sewn on the sleeve and began to have quite the inner monologue. 

Not my hand, nor my Snuggie

"Was this here the WHOLE time, and I've been teasing my mom about getting me a fake Snuggie?"

"Is this my roommate Adam's Snuggie? I didn't know Adam owned one!"

"Is this my nephew's Jr. Snuggie?"

And then after examining it, I realized that it was in fact mine...........sneaky mom!

Sorry to whomever bought a Snuggie at a yard sale.  If by any chance you are reading this, you have a totally 100% legit Snuggie. 

*Slanket=blanket with sleeves